While you are the process of learning something new Dear One, it is not the right time to be hard on yourself.
It is the time to be kind, loving, patient, forgiving, encouraging, nurturing, compassionate, and generous with yourself.
And since you are pretty much in the process of learning something new all the time…..
The right time to be hard on yourself, is, well, never.
You can never undo that which has been done, Dear One.
It’s impossible.
So please don’t waste your precious time and energy trying.
Once you have had an experience, for better or for worse, it is yours forever.
And regardless of how deeply you wish it could be so, no amount of regret, guilt, remorse, anger, self-pity, self-loathing, sadness, or hatred is ever going to change that.
But know this, that you are never without options, that there is always something that you can do.
It is always within your power Dear One, to change the way that you feel about it, to change what it means to you, to change its significance in your life.
And changing that, changes everything.
And success in this life is totally and completely determined by the amount of joy that you experience while living it.
We can see how hard you have been working Dear One.
Are you successful yet?
If you want to start feeling better about the decisions that you are making in your life Dear One, stop asking other people for their opinions about them.
You are here to have a personal experience of you, not a duplicate experience of someone else. There is no one that can ever know what is best for you better than you can.
Trust yourself a little bit more, your gut, your instincts and act accordingly. Make conscious decisions that make sense to you and soon you will find yourself living in a reality that is much more you then ever before.
What do you see/feel when you look around you Dear One? Do you see the life that you want for yourself unfolding before your eyes, or do you see someone else’s version of the perfect reality?
Give yourself some time to adjust to the fact that you are the creator of your own reality if you need to. But start trusting yourself and making decisions based on your desires, your experiences and your instincts right away. There is no reason at all for you to wait. Note how each decision makes you feel so that you can learn more about yourself and your preferences with each one that you make.
Forgive them for their mistakes Dear One, their shortcomings, their faults, their ignorance, and their impatience.
Forgive their actions when they react out of fear, their words when they respond from pain, their behaviors when they get defensive, and their callousness when they are cruel.
They are not perfect. They are deeply flawed. They are hurting, healing, learning, and coping the best way that they know how. Believe it or not, they are actually doing the very best that they believe that they are capable of.
They are imperfect Dear One – just like you.
Forgive them without expectation, without condition, without question and without hesitation.
Why?
Because doing so is one of the most powerful healing gifts that you can give to yourself.
Act courageously today Dear One.
Do something that you have been afraid to do. Say something that you have been afraid to say. Decide not to let the fear of rejection, embarrassment, or failure stop you.
And at the end of the day, regardless of the outcome, celebrate the fact that you did it.
We are not going to try and stop you from making self-destructive choices Dear One, repeating self-destructive patterns, or engaging in self-destructive relationships.
This is your life and you are free to choose to live it any way that you please.
But what we are going to do is try and help you to become more aware of the fact that you are doing so.
We want you to think about and be conscious of every single choice that you make. We want you to choose purposefully, deliberately, and with intention.
If you are making choices that are harming you, we would like for you to be fully aware of the fact that you are doing so.
This is your life Dear One, and you are free to make any choice that pleases you.
If, however, the choices that you are making are not pleasing to you, then we are going to do all that we can to encourage you to start making different ones
You are not lacking guidance Dear One. That you’ve got in spades.
What you are lacking is the confidence in yourself to believe it when you hear it – to trust it – to act on it.
Instead of asking for, searching for, seeking out more guidance – allow yourself to be courageous enough to act on that which you already know to be true.
Clarity comes with action Dear One. You’ll never know for sure until you try.
Hypocrisy: To say one thing and do another. There are very few people in this world that are not hypocrites at one time or another Dear One. And to this we say BRAVO! There are so many of you that say and talk about things that you wish you did, that you are wanting to do, but have not yet made not even the slightest effort to do them, and to this we say – OK.
Because we know it is coming. We know that so often talking about a thing precedes actually doing a thing. So if there are things you want to do, or beliefs you want to adopt, or causes you wish you were behind, we say – go for it – talk about them as if you are already doing them – Act as if you are virtuous if you want to be – Act as if you are loyal even if you are not yet. Act as if you are charitable even if your actions don’t yet match up with the sentiments – because if the intention is there and the desire is there then the action just might follow.
Don’t be so quick to judge another for what they have said and not yet done Dear One. Look instead at a person’s accomplishments, their successes, their virtues and if you must judge them, judge them based on those events. Judge them based on the best in them not on the worst in them.
Raise the roof on the possibilities that exist for them in their lives. Because as you know from experience, the expectations of others can and does have an influence on their behavior. So, if your expectations are going to have an influence on those around you, wouldn’t you rather that your influence be a positive one instead of a negative one?
So if you feel you must judge, we say go right ahead and judge – but don’t judge people based on the worst of them – make your judgments instead based on the very best of them – after-all isn’t that what you are hoping you will be judged on?
Make every excuse you can think of to feel good (or better) today, Dear One.
That is all.