Giving up is nothing to feel bad about Dear One.  Did you know that it’s OK to want to give up from time to time?  That it can actually be good for you?  Giving up is the ultimate form of surrender.

When you have nothing left to lose – when you stop trying – when you stop resisting what is –  when you reach your point of surrender – anything can happen, if you let it.

Surrender does not need to be hopeless, devastating or an indicator of weakness.  It can be intentional, exciting and an indicator of strength .  Don’t give up and expect the worst.  Give up and expect the best.  Give up control, fear, remorse, guilt, agitation.  Give up negativity.  Give yourself a break.  Try embracing surrender today and allow something unexpected to happen.

Don’t wait for them to decide Dear One, before you make your decision.

Release your dependency on them, and your expectations of them.

• Let them follow their bliss, and you follow yours
• Let them move at their pace, and you move at yours
• Let them decide what is best for them, and you decide what is best for you

Because in the end your happiness is not determined by what they think, what they say, what they do, what they choose, or when they choose to do it.

It is determined by how you do all of those things.

You are not in this alone, Dear One.

But you, alone, are the only one who can change things.

If you want things to be different, if you want a different life, different circumstances, different relationships, you’re going to have to start choosing differently.

You, and you alone are the only one who can make that happen.

Just in case you were wondering Dear One, the antidote to conflict is acceptance.

Complete and total acceptance.

Not approval.  Not agreement.  Not compromise.  Not settling.  Not accommodating.  Not pretending.  Not lying.  Not cheating. Not faking it.  And most definitely not resignation.

If you want to diffuse a conflict Dear One, accept what is, exactly as it is, for exactly what it is, as quickly as you possibly can.

And once you do, once you stop pushing, resisting, railing against what is, once you let go of the emotional charge that conflict brings to a situation, then, and only then, will you be in a position (a very powerful one actually) to make a thoughtful, rational, intentional, and heartfelt decision about what you are going to do next.

Do you want to know how to make today a good day Dear One?

Only make choices that make you smile.

If you feel as if you have lost your balance Dear One, if you feel as if you are having trouble getting both of your feet planted firmly on the ground, the single most important thing that you can do for yourself in this moment,  is to find it again.

How can you do that?

By asking yourself the following before every step that you take, and answering it honestly:

Will this choice, will this action, will this conversation, will this program, will this meal, will this purchase, will this person, will this decision, bring me closer to achieving a state of balance in my life or carry me farther away from it?

That’s how.

In this moment, never mind what you should be doing or could be doing Dear One.  Never mind what they need from you or what they want from you.  Never mind what their expectations are.  Let them go.

In this moment all that really matters is you – what you think of you – what you want from you – what you expect from you – what you want this day to be.

When was the last time that you allowed the sound of your own voice, your own heart, your own wants, your own needs to lead you – regardless of the needs, wants and expectations of those around you?

In this moment, ignore them Dear one.  Ignore all of them and listen only to yourself, to you own inner voice.  Pay close attention to the details of what it has to say to you – because your own heart holds much wisdom for you.  It holds much love and compassion and forgiveness for you too.

In this moment, allow yourself to connect with that wisdom.

And in the next, allow yourself to follow it.

Everything that you are wanting Dear One, is available to you in the present moment – joy, health, love, laughter, change, abundance, freedom – all of it.

Choose it in the moment and it will be yours, right now.

Continue to choose it over and over again, and it will be yours forever.

You can’t punish yourself for making a mistake, misjudgment, or misstep Dear One, and come back into alignment, return to your flow, make it right again, at the same time.

You’re going to have to choose, one or the other.

You’re going to have to decide which is more important to you, returning to well-being and restoring balance, or remaining self-critical.

What’s it going to be?

The most important question that you need to ask yourself, Dear One, once you decide what it is that you want is not Can I do this? but Will I do this?

• Will you allow yourself to believe that it is possible?
• Will you allow that belief to inspire you to action?
• Will you allow certainty to dominate your thoughts?
• Will you choose to move forward with confidence?
• Will you choose to make feeling good about it a priority?
• Will you choose to let go of all of the things that no longer serve you, including negative thoughts, actions, behaviors, and relationships that are keeping you from it?
• Will you choose to allow it into your life, gently, quickly, graciously, joyfully?

We know that you can, Dear One.

But will you?