I’ve got a two new events coming up in the next few days and weeks; one in New York and the other in Rhode Island.

If you are able to make it to either, I would love to see you there!

Author Signing Event
Saturday, May 26^th, from 2:30pm – 4:30pm

Barnes & Nobel, Middletown Village
1311 West Main Road
Middletown, RI 02842

The bookstore is about 12 minutes from the beautiful Newport waterfront.

You can find directions to the store here.

Discussion, QA, Reading & Signing Event
Friday, June 8^th, from 7pm – 8:30pm

Turn of the Corkscrew, Books & Wine
110 N Park Ave
Rockville Center, NY

Turn of the Corkscrew is a bookstore and wine bar so whether you are motived by the wisdom, the wine or both, I hope to see you there.

You can RSVP here.

Whether or not to love someone is not a decision that can be made logically Dear one. So stop trying so hard to try to “figure it out”.  Because you won’t, you can’t.  Love is not a decision to be made.  Love is a feeling, a force, an experience that you allow, that you share, that you enjoy.

Either you love / allow love to flow through you and to you, or you don’t.

You allow love Dear One.  You don’t choose it.

Either they inspire the feeling, the allowing of it in you, or they do not.

The only decision to be made when it comes to love Dear One is whether or not you are brave enough, open enough, moved enough,  desiring a connection enough, to allow it, to experience it, to surrender yourself to it, when inspiration should strike.

Do you want to know one of the best ways for you to get to know yourself better Dear One?

Slow down, put in the effort, take the time, and get to know them better.

Find out who they really are, what they feel, think, and believe, why they do what they do, why they say what they say.

Make every interaction really personal.

By taking the time to get to know who they really are, instead of spending your time with some superficial version of who you think they really are, you will  be tapping  into a wealth of information about yourself.

Your feelings about them, your reactions to them, and your responses to the real them, will reveal a lot to you, about you.

Whatever it is, whatever you’ve done, or not done, or thought about doing, or didn’t have time to do, or did too quickly, slowly or halfway, or did out of vengeance, anger, fear or weakness  –  practice compassion, kindness, and forgiveness with yourself today, Dear One when you think about it.

Beating yourself up will not serve you in any positive capacity towards doing it differently or better today.

Trust us.  We know.

Kindness.  Compassion. Forgiveness.

Then let it go.

That’s the only way to ensure that the yesterday you will experience tomorrow will be different from today.

The only way to experience change, Dear One, to get somewhere you have never been before, is to choose to do something you have never done before, to say something  you have never said before, to try something you have never tried before, to walk a path you have never walked before, to trust, have faith, be brave, leap.

We know that you know this already.

But we thought that you could use the reminder.

If you want something to be different today Dear One, do something differently.

When the sun comes up in the morning, you know this is a part of a cycle, Dear One.  When the sun sets in the evening, you know this too is part of the same cycle. You do not wonder when the sun disappears at the end of the day if it will rise again the next.  You count on it doing so and act accordingly.

Like the rising and setting of the sun, there are certain cycles that are always at play in your life. Can you spot them? Are there cycles in your romantic relationships, your creativity, your physicality, your friendships, your work?

When it gets dark in the evenings you adjust to that stage of the sun’s cycle.  You have learned to accept and adapt to periods of darkness without fear.  You behave differently during them then you might when the sun is bright. One stage is not better or worse than the other, but each is more or less ideal for completing certain tasks.

Witness the other cycles in your life and take note of how you adapt to periods of darkness vs. light.

When cycles are in motion, things will always change, and change, and then change again.  How you choose to experience that change is up to you.  You can fight it, fear it, dread it, or hate it, or you can trust it, accept it, embrace it and adapt to it, with the eager anticipation of waiting for the beauty of the next sunrise, trusting that regardless of how dark the night may become, that the light will always return.

If you are unsure of what it means to love yourself Dear One, of what it looks like to love yourself, of what you are meant to do, of how you are meant to think, speak act, and behave towards yourself in ways that are loving, we will tell you precisely what you can do to figure it out.

Think of someone that you love very much, deeply, purely, totally, and completely.  Imagine how you would care for them, speak to them, think of them, feed them, comfort, them, react and respond to them if they came to you confused, unsure or in need, with a question, a problem, or hurt feelings, with a broken heart, body or spirit.

• Have you got it?
• Are you picturing it?
• Can you imagine what you would do for them?
• Can you imagine how you would treat them?

If you can, then you’ve just found your answer.

In order for your current reality to look and feel and taste and smell more the way you want it to Dear One, you’ve got to be willing to make some sacrifices.

You’ve got to be willing to sacrifice the old story you’ve been telling about yourself, the old image you’ve been holding onto of yourself,  the old patterns that you have been maintaining for yourself.

You’ve got to consciously decide to give them up before you can move on.

Do you think you can do that?

Do you think you can make those sacrifices Dear One?

We do.

And we’ll even help you to get started.

Paint a picture in your head of what you want your life to look like, to feel like, to be like Dear One.  Allow yourself to really go there in your heart.  Stay in this place, creating as much detail as you possibly can until you find yourself smiling and enjoying the experience you are creating for yourself.

Got it?

Now start living and acting, and making choices and decisions as if you were already there.

Do you want to know what’s  coming next Dear One?  Do you want to know what is headed your way right now?

The short answer is: It depends

• When you create peacefully, when you think, speak, act, and feel at peace, you are creating peace, you are attracting peacefulness to you, you are in the process of manifesting peaceful people, events, and circumstances into your life.

• When you create from a place of stress, from a place of agitation, desperation, or hopelessness, from a place of fear, lack, or greed, with a lack of compassion, empathy, or forgiveness, you are engaging in the process of manifesting into your life people, events, and circumstances that will bring you more of the same.

So if you want to know what is coming next Dear One, if you want to know what is headed your way right now, start paying attention to how you are feeling, what you are thinking, what you are saying, how you are behaving, and the attitude with which you are doing it all, and it won’t take long for you to figure it out.

• Don’t worry that you have missed out Dear One.
• Don’t worry that you made the wrong choice, waited too long, or missed the boat.
• You have not. You did not. You can not.

Do you know what the universal force is that dictates the experiences, people, and relationships that you are and are not meant to have in your life?

You are it!

If it didn’t happen, if you didn’t choose it, then it was not meant to be.  It’s just that simple.

So don’t worry, regret or fret over that which was not Dear One.

Instead enjoy, give your attention to, celebrate that which was, that which is, instead.

And if you should find yourself in the all too common situation where you have made a choice that you are not enjoying – accept it, learn from it, and choose again.